A Guide to Depression, Dating, and Your Sex Life

As any sex therapist in Palo Alto can tell you, there are a number of factors that keep you from a fulfilling love life. Any mental health concerns that are left untreated can eventually affect your romantic relationships and other areas of your life.

If you struggle with depression of any kind, you’re more likely to experience stress when it comes to dating, relationships, and sex.

It’s important to understand its impact so that you can take effective steps to conquer it:

Depression and Dating

Depression often takes a toll on your self-esteem and confidence, but it’s possible to date while depressed with the following measures:

• Respect your own moods. Schedule your dates for when you’re feeling well enough to go. If you must reschedule, give the other person plenty of notice, and suggest a few alternatives.
  
  
• Keep your expectations in check. Don’t expect to find ‘the one’ right away, and don’t feel pressured to bring up your depression on the first date.
  
  
• If you’re on a date and struggling to get out of your head, try asking open-ended questions about your date and their life.

When you’re seeing someone new, you don’t need to disclose things about your mental health early on.

Consider bringing it up briefly only when you feel comfortable with them and having a deeper conversation about it later when there’s more trust and intimacy.

Depression and Relationships

You’ll need to be more proactive about your depression when you’re in a relationship. Here are a few tips to keep in mind:

• Make yourself responsible for your own mental health. Go to therapy regularly, work on understanding yourself, and try to become more attuned to your emotions and feelings.
  
  
• Practice open communication and honesty with your partner. They deserve to know about your mental health not being at its best the way they deserve to know about your physical illnesses.
  
  
• Don’t expect your partner to read your mind. Instead, get comfortable with stating your needs. They can only help you if they know how to.

Depression and Sex

Depression itself can decrease your sex drive, but some of the medications prescribed to treat it can also diminish your libido and make it difficult to experience arousal. Here are some steps to follow:

• Medication is rarely the only answer. Therapy or counseling can help you change your thought patterns and behaviors. Discuss your options with your mental health practitioner.
  
  
• It’s essential to have a frank discussion with your partner about your desires and any challenges you might be facing in fulfilling them.
  
  
• Define your sex life on your own terms, and remember that it only needs to be enjoyable for you and your partner. Media depictions of sex can give people warped, unrealistic expectations of sexuality.

Sex therapy in Palo Alto can help you develop a better understanding of your sexuality and how to express it.

At Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling, couples and individuals can benefit from counseling for depression, anxiety counseling, relationship counseling, infidelity counseling, couples counseling, and marriage and family therapy in Palo Alto.

Set up a consultation by calling us at (650) 206-9973 or sending us a message.