Being in a relationship is hard work. Having spent all our lives being told to live independently, it often comes as a shock to many when they realize that now; we’ll have to think about someone else as passionately as we think about ourselves.
And because we aren’t told how to balance this attention, we end up making mistakes. And that causes problems. This is why it’s important that we learn how to support one another, and give each other peace, so we can encourage our relationship and keep it healthy.
5 Things to do to encourage a Healthy Relationship
1. Understand that Your Relationship is Your Priority
Your relationship with your partner isn’t going to maintain itself. Neither should you expect your partner to put in the hard work while you contribute nothing. People struggle in a relationship when one or both people do not give it the priority it needs. You must accept the truth that while your life is moving at a fast pace, and that you have other priorities, your relationship is a priority as well. Do not treat it as an afterthought.
2. Do Not Stonewall
Stonewalling is the inability to communicate or cooperate. Just because you don’t want to speak about a certain situation, it won’t make it go away. Stonewalling is a tactic used as a power move, so as to break down the opposition’s patience. However, when you stonewall, you actually show your own maturity. A relationship isn’t a ‘me versus you’ situation. You’re both in this together and there should be no power struggle.
3. Learn to Be Fully Present
Know the difference between hearing and listening? Listening involves you actually showing an interest in what you’re hearing. When conversing with your partner, you need to be fully present in body and mind. You can’t expect them to be happy if your attention is diverted from the conversation because you got a text message. Show them that you actually value their presence and the conversation.
4. Learn to Share
Emotional support is a major component in any relationship. However, if you’re not offering or receiving that emotional support, there’s a problem. If your partner does not know how to share, ask them and be patient with their response. If you don’t know how to share, understand that as your partner, the person with you wants to know about your life and your day, even if they’re simple details. Talk to them.
5. Don’t be Afraid to Daydream
You’re both building your lives together, with each other. Be positive and think about future possibilities. Talk about your hopes and dreams and your little plans and ideas, no matter how far-fetched. You’ll feel a lot closer to them when you understand that this is exactly what you’re meant to do in a relationship – plan your future together!
Strengthen Your Relationship
As a leading therapist in Palo Alto, Azizeh E. Rezaiyan from Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling offers her counseling for all couples who need to speak about their issues.
With so many couples dealing with relationship problems – along with personal problems such as depression and anxiety – the best thing one can do is find someone who will give them a solution.
If you are a couple in need of help, contact Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling and set an appointment.