Being cheated on is arguably one of the worst things that can happen to someone. . It destroys your self-esteem, mental health, and of course, your relationship. It’s impossible to move past being cheated on for a lot of people, and sometimes, the victims of this act can never make the horrible feeling go away.
But there is light at the end of the tunnel, and you can find closure, and healing, both as an individual or even as a couple if the other person in the relationship feels the same way about it as you do, despite a tough roadblock like infidelity. The closure is important for you to regain a sense of self, balance the power in the relationship, and work through the issues that came up and wrecked your life. Working with a counselor, you can also do the following:
Prioritize your emotional needs & well-being
While some couples may see a full-blown affair as cheating, others may count flirty texts as cheating too. No matter where you draw the line, if your partner betrayed your trust, and hurt you, you need to hold your own and keep it together. You need to put yourself and your needs before theirs. Figure out what it is that you need for your well-being, whether that’s a need for space, time apart, therapy, healing, and processing, you should focus on that. Take time to appreciate yourself, understanding your needs, and getting to know your priotityies; work through the insecurities the experience may have triggered for you.
Don’t forgive & forget because you can’t
If you’re still committed to your partner and want to work things out, don’t rush to forgiveness just yet. Forgiveness is a later step along the way and your partner needs to earn it. Analyzing where things may have gone wrong comes before offering forgiveness. Analyze where communication gaps lie, whether both of you want to make it work, and much more. It’s a long, painful journey of self-reflection, honesty, and being true to your feelings. Remember that space we talked about? It might be a great way to clear your head. So spend some quality time with yourself and decide how you want to proceed.
Seek couples therapy & counseling
It could get messy and awkward especially if one of you is short-tempered when you attempt to resolve things on your own or with the involvement of friends and family. Your relationship is entirely unique, and nobody can know and understand the intricacies the way you do. Loved ones may be biased or could just dismiss your pain and struggles.
This is why you should work with a trained therapist who specializes in both couples and individual counseling and can help you process your experience with infidelity. Couples therapy could be the path to healing and finding a new normal, It can lead you to a place where you feel comfortable with yourself, your partner, and the future of your relationship.
Every step involved in the process i.e. closure, therapy, and healing will also show you the way to setting new boundaries, honoring and upholding them for your peace of mind, sanity, and sanctity. Cheating can take a toll on relationships and individuals, and sometimes finding closure and regaining your self-worth can be a lot more difficult than we realize. Work closely with us as we offer you marriage counseling, relationship counseling, sex therapy, depression treatment, and other services in Palo Alto. There is light at the end of the tunnel—our job is to help you get there.