3 Conversations You Must Have Before Marriage

Getting married soon and premarital counseling is the last thing on your mind? We’ll advise you to touch upon some critical issues before making things official with your partner. 

It’s better not to head down the aisle until you have discussed issues such as finances, kids, career, religion, and other essential aspects. Here we’ve discussed some crucial conversations that you must have with your spouse-to-be.

When to Have Kids and How to Raise Them?

Talk about children and whether you want any. The twist begins after deciding on having kids. Discuss the possible options you may be open to if you don’t conceive naturally. Are you open to adoption? If yes, will it be a boy or a girl? If you are blessed with a child, discuss the time each of you needs before welcoming another one. 

Moreover, experts advise couples to discuss how they wish to raise their kids once they have some. Every individual has a different opinion when it comes to disciplining the child. Hence, discuss beforehand how to react when they disobey, the religion they will follow, the school they will attend, etc. Create a time plan and follow it rigorously to avoid any conflicts related to kids. 

How Will We Manage Our Finances And Careers?

Finances are considered one of the most significant causes of conflicts between partners. If you both work to make ends meet, assess your earnings and decide about investments and expenses. Also, if one earns more than the other, discuss how the contribution takes place, whether the accounts will be separate or joint, and how much each gets for personal expenses. Couples also need to be on the same page to make savings-related decisions for their future.

Moreover, it is important to respect each other’s career ambitions when getting married. Partners must have a conversation about managing children and work together so both can have a career they desire. 

What Is The Best Plan To Handle Fights?

Conflicts and fights are inevitable, but you and your partner can handle them with a mature approach. Each partner will have a different way of dealing with an argument, so it’s better to examine some of the previous fights and reassess them. Once that’s done, sit together and decide how you would like to handle it in the future. Additionally, identify the red flags, such as behavioral aspects that are unacceptable during the fight, and communicate them, so you can avoid them in the future. 

If this feels like too much work, premarital counseling is your best bet. At Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling, we offer the best couples counseling in Palo Alto. Our range of services includes family relationship counseling, infidelity therapy, depression treatment, anxiety counseling, and family mediation services, among others.

You can schedule an appointment online or call (650) 206-9973 for a free 20-minute phone consultation.