Statistics show that anxiety disorder impacts 40 million adults in the United States who are over the age of 18 but only around 40% of these people seek treatment for it.
Living with anxiety without the awareness of managing it effectively can make things more challenging. It creeps up in different ways for different people depending on our personal experiences, family dynamics, etc.
One of the things your anxiety can be an unwelcome guest to is your relationship, even before it begins. Sometimes you might find yourself overanalyzing yourself to the point of being so critical of everything, that you can’t even bring yourself to consider dating an option.
It can also hold you back from seeking couple’s counseling as a viable option if you’re already in a relationship because it causes marital distress and a higher risk of divorcing within the first year of marriage.
What does relationship anxiety look like?
It might also lead you to question your happiness, just waiting for the other shoe to drop, expecting things to go sour. This can be a barrier in finding yourself in a position to commit to someone and cause you to sabotage your relationship.
Relationship anxiety can manifest itself in the following scenarios:
You find it hard to convince yourself that another person can love you or about what their intentions are. It leads you to live in constant fear of being abandoned or left alone. You might worry too much about whether your partner feels the same way about you or if they want to end the relationship. This can take a toll on your relationship.
Not having enough self-confidence
You find yourself often too suspicious of your partner, wondering where they are all the time. You might check up on them too often and need constant reassurance from them.
Not being able to communicate
People who experience general anxiety disorder may be unable to receive or tend to a partner’s needs because they might be consumed in their own anxiety.
They also find it hard to express their feelings and too often feel defensive in their romantic ties. This kind of ineffective communication can hold you back from being your authentic self and also cause you to be impatient with your partner.
This can be difficult for a loved one to understand if they don’t know what relationship anxiety is.
Not being able to understand boundaries
Often the need to know your partner’s whereabouts or feel connected to them constantly, can come off as being extra clingy and dependent toward them.
This can be an invasion of privacy or personal boundaries that your partner may want to maintain, and that you need to establish in order to feel more comfortable about the relationship.
What can you do?
Relationship anxiety shows up in different ways for everyone. You may relate to any of the aforementioned scenarios or none at all, but all of us can find ways to manage anxiety if we have the right support.
Seeking counseling services for your anxiety or marriage counseling is a great start. Get in touch with Azizeh Rezaiyan at Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling. Call (650) 206-9973 to schedule a free 20-minutes consultation.