Depression is not a gender-centric illness. Affecting men and women, depression continues to take a toll on around 350 million people worldwide.
However, this blog is focused on men because, unlike women who might ask someone for help, or vent to someone, men cannot do the same.
This statement does not encompass the entire male population.
However, a general consensus is that a vast majority of men – due to traditional points of view and upbringing – are not able to get the help they need. Men in our society are taught to believe that stating any matters of depression and anxiety makes them weak and vulnerable. And because a man’s status in society is to always be strong and tough; they are not able to ask for assistance or for even a shoulder to cry on.
This causes them to suffer greatly.
State of Depression in Men
Men have a different mindset than women. Often, they associate emotions or anything related to making themselves vulnerable, as weakness. Compared to women, they strive to be more powerful, more confident and more successful. All factors contribute to this thinking that they are all-mighty.
Many men believe that talking about their feelings – whether to a doctor or a loved one – will make them weak, will expose them and drive a crack in their persona of being all-powerful. And that’s when they make their biggest mistake.
Emotions – happiness, anger, fear – are not a mistake, brought on by an imbalance in the brain. They are not something that needs to be ignored or gotten rid of. Emotions are natural, and any illness related to them must be focused on.
Marriage and Dealing with Depression
Married men often face problems due to an inability to cope with disagreements. They try to avoid conflict. But this causes them to not actually take any action to solve it. But their partner wants the conflict to be solved, and because they’re not able to talk about it, they try to make more of an effort. But that pushes the man away because they feel like they’re being nagged, and that makes them withdraw more.
This in turn causes their partner to feel ignored, and thus the cycle goes on.
For some men who deal with depression in a marriage, they end up feeling weak and unmanly, and that causes them to become violent because of frustration.
Getting Help with Male Depression
Depression is not something that you can just ignore and hope to go away. Like any illness, depression requires constant care and professional advice, something you can only get from a professional therapist.
Offering therapy for male depression among other issues, Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling aims to help men and women with their mental health issues.
If you or your loved one is suffering from depression or anxiety, contact us in Palo Alto and book an appointment for therapy.