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Pre-Marital Counseling: Potential Conflicts You Can Expect to Discuss

Pre-marital counseling is a type of couple therapy that is proven effective for a long-term commitment like marriage. It involves seeking professional help to uncover and address a potential issue that can arise during the relationship.

According to a survey, couples who received counseling and pre-marital education before their marriage reported a 30% stronger marriage bond than other couples.

Although it may be uncomfortable, pre-marital counseling is crucial to understand and acknowledge your partner’s concerns, long-term goals, finances and, gender roles.

Here are 4 potential conflicts you can expect to discuss in pre-marital counseling.

Marriage Expectations and Gender Roles

In pre-marital counseling, you’ll have to be honest about your expectations from your partner and what you’re willing to do in return. It includes addressing an uncomfortable topic – gender role, that will decide your marriage structure and how both of you will contribute to the household. It will also discuss your existing beliefs about the relationship and how you plan to carry it forward.

With professional help, you can discuss potential issues and form strategies to overcome the challenges that may arise in the future.


Some couples dread pre-marital counseling because they fear uncovering issues that might affect their bond. However, discussing uncomfortable and difficult topics then will save your marriage from pitfalls in the future. Discussing finances is equally essential to avoid conflicts later in married life. 

There should be no shame in being open about financial history, income and spending. It is crucial to make financial decisions like dividing finances and individual saving goals. If both of you are earning, combining finances will ensure transparent budgeting. Whatever decision you take, it includes the consent of both partners.

Family and Parenting

It’s unbelievable how most couples do not discuss whether they want kids, how many kids, their education, values, and family involvement before tying the knot. It inarguably leads to daily conflicts that result in an unhappy marriage.

Discuss with your spouse-to-be your parenting reservations, trauma, and expectations. Maybe one of you doesn’t want to have kids immediately. In pre-marital counseling, you can have a healthy discussion on the topic. The counselor will address your fears and concerns and help you reach a common ground. The strategies you learn will help you cope with challenges throughout your marriage.

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Getting married is a significant life decision that you shouldn’t make in haste. If you are looking for couple therapy to uncover and discuss potential issues with your partner, connect with us at Silicon Valley Marriage Counseling. The licensed and experienced therapist, Dr. Azizeh E. Rezaiyan, specializes in couple counseling and understands individual goals and expectations.

She values the clients’ privacy and provides practical tips and strategies to overcome the pre-marital challenges. Get in touch with us to learn more.

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